I have a very dear friend who is gay. He is a widower with a great family legacy that reaches across generations. And he has recently identified himself as someone who has an attraction to the same sex.
He is also a Christian and has demonstrated his faith in many ways over our many years of friendship. He also possesses a professional pedigree that includes academic degrees, a career of experience, and a compassionate heart for those who are broken and hurting.
After the appearance of Lauren Daigle on a recent television show and the attendant controversy over her statements about homosexuality and sin played out in social media, your emotions, too, might have been raised a bit by reading my first two paragraphs above. We often drive to our emotions first on this issue, so let me show you how being both gay and Christian can harmonize. You see, sexuality is sacred.
My first response to his identifying as gay was a lack of understanding. I have never struggled with these attractions, and know only a few who have. I have worked alongside others who have emerged from that lifestyle and found those professional interactions both enlightening and encouraging. They have taught me that once you identify as gay doesn’t consign you to that identification forever. God is a God of hope, and He exists. God offers us both grace and redemption—something no other worldview offers. My friend understands these truths well.
The Bible says that sexuality is sacred. God created us male and female. He created the beauty and magnificence of womankind to complement and advance His creation of man. He entrusted to both male and female the ability to procreate—how incredibly loving our God must be to give us this creative charge.
My friend is not conflicted by these paragraphs. He is both gay and Christian. He is following in a line of precious souls like the late Catholic priest Henri Nouwen, a great theologian with an unmistakable heart for broken people. Like Fr. Nouwen, my friend chooses not to act on his proclivities for the sake of the Gospel. This must be difficult, and still he reaches out to others to encourage them that they can follow these same Biblical precepts in their lifestyles as well.
In a culture that would rather have us be confused to these points, the Bible is clear. My friend didn’t write the Bible. He is just living it out the best way he knows how. In a lot of ways, he is the “same kind of different as me.” Just as I could wander away from my marital boundaries, I choose not to. When I said “yes” to my bride, I said “no” to all of the others. When I said “I will” to my bride, I said “no” to all of the others. There is no difference. Sexuality is sacred.
I am not perfect and neither is my friend. That said, I honor his commitment, and may God bless his many efforts on His behalf.